D A D B L O G S
A dad blog by a geek dad with two geeky kids.
H is a friend who has been close to my wife and I since our first child was born. For that span of time that we've known him, he was a single parent to two daughters as his wife left without telling them anything. Now that the kids are growing up, H can see their need for a mother.
If I were to be asked, I'd rather tell H to leave out remarrying in his future plans since he has already been alone with the kids for some years. Choosing to be a good and supportive friend, here are some insights I am sharing with him and to those caught in the same dilemma.
Consider the kids - Ask whether the kids really need another parent. They are the ones who will find it difficult to adjust to the situation. Find a new partner whom they are going to like and accept like their real parent.
Consider your finances - Are you in debt at the moment? Be sure you have erased all your debts before remarrying. Remarrying can open you to another season expenses especially if you plan to have another kid.
Sharing is really a difficult thing to do particularly to kids who are below five years old. Kids older than five years old may find sharing easier if there are conditions from which they can benefit greatly. As parents, we must not impose sharing on our kids. They must share only when they believe doing it. The best thing parents could do this is to model sharing whenever possible. Apart from showing them how to do it, parents must also intentionally show the joy of sharing.
When is the best time to show kids the importance and benefits of sharing? Incidence of a natural catastrophe can be a good example. Surely, the kids will see how victims of a natural disaster would be lacking so many things. Talk to your kids and ask them what they can share. Ask them to note how they feel after they have shared some of their valuables. Ask too if they would be willing to share again.